Friday, August 7, 2009

A course we truly need to defeminazilized our women (I only wish this was real).

My wife noticed this on one of our local online bulletin board. I know it was listed on the "jokes" section but how sorely this class is needed in our country with the war against males. I thought I share here.

Fall Classes for Women at THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Tuesday, July 28, 2009

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1

Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.Meets 4 wks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..

Class 2

Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?Round Table Discussion.Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.


Class 3

Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4

Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5

Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?Examples on Video.Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM

Class 6

How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program. Help Line Support and Support Groups.Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7

Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?Open Forum.Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8

(Tied for my favorite) Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT! Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9

(The other tie for my favorite) I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined. (good luck female libs)

Class 10

How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.Driving Simulations.4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11

Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield.Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12

How to Shop by Yourself.Meets 4 wks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13

How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering To Take a List To The Store, Avoiding Separate Trips for Each Item Needed.Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14

The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.Live Demonstration.Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

I hope you enjoyed the laugh. I know my wife and I did.

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